Wacky ‘Ronaldo-inspired’ comedy film a surprise hit at Cannes festival

A surreal comedy that features a superstar footballer bearing a striking resemblance to Cristiano Ronaldo has become the surprise sensation of the Cannes film festival.

“Diamantino” follows a preening metrosexual goal machine with a fondness for displaying his waxed torso at every possible occasion.

Every time he bears down on a goal afterwards, he is haunted by images of gigantic pink Pekingese lapdogs blocking his way. Having lost his killer touch, his career ends in disgrace.

The Hollywood Reporter raved that “what makes Diamantino such a gem is that it is not only a completely wacky story filled with the most improbable B-movie tropes… and a constant barrage of unexpected twists and turns” but that it also had important things to say.

“It’s a Trojan Horse of a movie, smuggling in big ideas on the backs of gigantic lapdogs in fluffy pink clouds involved in one of the wackiest plots you’ve ever heard or seen. Finally, you can have your B-movie cake and eat it with grade-A ideas,” said critic Boyd van Hoeij.

The movie’s American co-director Daniel Schmidt said it was the underlying innocence of the Ronaldo character that holds the mad romp together. “I think the chaos of today is mirrored in the film. Like any good fairy tale, I hope it entertains while offering a new perspective on what’s happening in the world. Diamantino’s innocent perspective links it all together.”