Most of the time, I have come across people claiming that if someone continuously try to garner your attention (please note through abuse) it’s love or likeness. How could that be real? And, how so? Why on Earth a bully would be interested in you anyway. Cherry on top, it is not just our thinking but we are infusing this in our children and teens too.
Someone disturbing you? Follows you in school all the time? Oh, Sweetie! He must really like you. BULLSHIT.
Telling someone that abuse is something close to love is as poisonous as a poison could be. It troubles me to the core that people don’t understand what implications such a statement or preaching could have. Aggression is not a “modest” means of communication and justifying or glorifying it is totally not okay.
It may seem that I am being an attention seeking feminist here, but look around, Pakistani society is filled with such stances. When you start thinking that someone bullying is giving you attention, you accept abusive relationships. Similarly, infusing within boys is the teaching that it is okay to hurt someone for expressing their adoration, love and affection.
Once you have sanctioned this kind of mistreatment, how are you going to tell them later in life that it is immoral to hurt girls?
We should teach girls that first time a boy puts his hands on her or try to make her fun without her consent, should be his last time.
Tell girls that love means respect, care, friendship, honesty, loyalty, support and top of all friendship. And on the other hand, every boy needs to know that aggression is not the means of showing affection, generosity or love. Let’s face the fact and stand together to make self-confidence, self-reliance and self-assurance a reality; be it a girl or boy.
The next time I won’t or can’t tolerate someone telling girls that he loves/ likes you and this is why he shows his anger on you only.